Uh-Oh, I've done it again

So the other morning I sneezed. Not like a huge, monstrous disgusting sneeze. Just a normal cute one. But it caught me off gaurd and I guess my stomach muscles weren't ready for it or something because  it caused something in my back to "pop". Which I immediately knew was a bad thing. Luckily, I also knew it wasn't too terribly bad but just bad enough to cause me some discomfort. Throughout the night and the following day the pain got worse, and I thought, " oh hell, there is no point in living like this." So I called my Neurologist who is another Dr. Awesome in my book, and he told me to go to Urgent care being that it was a weekend. So off I went. Honestly, I was kind of freaked out about this. Because all I wanted was some drugs. And I knew that I was going to have to fill out their forms and tell them all the meds I'm currently taking for my bipolar. And then I was nervous that they were going to see that I'm bipolar and flag me as some kind of drug addict. Because it IS a fact that a lot of people with bipolar disorder are addicted to drugs and alcohol. So it really sucked shuffling into that office. I was just hoping and praying that they wouldn't look at my "stuff" and judge me and that they would just give me some pain killers and muscle relaxers and send me on my way. When the Dr. walked in and saw me laying on the table with tears rolling down my face I think I said the dumbest thing in the world. ( which I have a habit of doing when I get nervous) I said, " Hi, I'll be honest with you, I'm drug seeking."  Luckily, he laughed and said I'm seeking pain relief.  Oh, yeah, Right.
Filling out Dr. forms and checking the box "Mental Disorder" is VERY disturbing. I hate it. Most the time I struggle with the idea of just lying. I hate having to list my medications. too. I hate feeling like a nut job.
But its the motions that I go through. Maybe someday I will be able to deal with it better. For now, its just so new to me. Needless to say, I got my pain meds. I'm at home feeling relaxed and relieved and am hoping the back pain heals on its own in a couple days.